March 13, 2008
The foreign soldiers were at our house again, damn bastards were looking for Devin again. Not that they would ever be able to find him anyway, he was just too smart for them.
Unfortunately for us, they burned our shed down, thinking that if they weren't able to get him alive, they would at least be able to kill him and be rid of a problem. It was a pain to watch, it was cruel to see them laughing at our shocked faces, but when they saw that none of us cried, they knew that Devin wasn't hiding in there.
One of the soldiers came and grabbed Susan instead, laughing like a maniac, telling us in a broken English that she would pay for everything. Susan, poor Susan, only just 15 years old. I wonder if she is still alive, is she being treated well. If only we were strong enough to go against them somehow. I had heard from some of the old ladies that a group had formed to fight back against small groups of soldiers that usually came to pick up stuff from empty houses. I don't think mum would let me join them, let them train me some. I don't think I would be able to fight. When they burned the shed, my knees felt weak, I felt vulnerable and scared. I hope that these women can do us some good, that they will be protected and maybe one day, get our lives back in order. Maybe then, dad and Susan would be able to come home again, Devin wouldn't have to hide anymore either then, I pray for that day, to whoever is able to grant me my wishes and hopes.
March 16, 2008
Whoever finds this, I hope you are not one of the enemies. I would hope for some justice.
The soldiers came an hour ago, they carried their guns and torches, some had those weird helmets on, I think they can see in the dark, because when Rusty can from the kitchen they shot him without a second to wait. It was terrible, that stupid dog had to see if it was Devin who came home for a snack, and he ended up being shot. I was able to hide with mum, at least in the beginning. Mum ran into the forest, hoping to find Devin and warn him. She left me alone in the old mill, that didn't burn down with the shed. She told me to stay in there, if they would burn it I could run into the underground packing place, nothing would get me there, not with so many ways out. I haven't seen mum in about 45 minutes now, and the more minutes that pass I feel like I will never see her again. I hear the soldiers walk around the house, throwing our stuff around, it's making so much noise. Taking everything nice and shiny, or so I think, who wouldn't? I hear their yelling, but I don't understand what they are saying, everything ends up in a muffled voice.
Another hour passed, mum hasn't come back, and I have no idea what the soldiers are still doing outside. Are they thinking one of us will come out and surrender? Well not me, I'd rather die than get into their hands. Poor Susan, was she alive?
The air is getting colder, it must be colder outside, are they going to leave soon?
I think someone is in the mill, standing right by the door of where I am hiding, my heart is beating so loud. I bet he will hear it, that or me scribbling away in my book. I just want someone to know what happened before it is too late.
The door opens. I'm not sure if they will be able to see me, I hope not. There are the soldiers with the helmet again. I think they-
Part 2
May 6, 2051
Life did a 180° change on us, nothing was as before, not the people and not our believes and hopes, we were on our own and that was something we had to accept. Those that are young, like me, who had never really experienced anything different before, didn't really mind how life is now. Not much at least. Me, who was born in this messed up world, born and branded as something that was supposed to be normal, was raised in a family of fighters. My grandmother, my mother and all her sisters were part of a very active group of defenders. I learned that this life was not right, not acceptable and not in the least normal.
Today, I'm going to enter this world. I'm going to a part of this group, that I've heard of all my life, but was never allowed to know. That was then, this is now.
Aunt Aren woke me this morning, shouting and running around my bed, collecting everything that might be something dangerous to find. We weren't that hectic anymore, we hadn't been in a long time. I grabbed my clothes and everything I could find and stuffed them into the little hiding place under my bed. After that it only took the soldiers five minutes to storm into our house and to keep us from doing anything. Someone in town had spread rumors to them again. It happened a lot, someone would listen in on us going on about what happened in the capital, what we thought about it and then go off to the soldiers telling them we got weapons hidden in our basement that could delete the whole city from a map. If we had something like that, I think we would have already used it. Those bastards deserve to eat the dirt of their doings, locked away would be too easy, they wouldn't understand the grief that they made us feel for all these years. No, we didn't have anything like that, but what we did have was a free mind and that was dangerous as well. I remember a few years back, when mums stuff got taken away, all her books and papers that she had in her den. She was furious and pretty much threatened anyone that was looking from the other side of the street that they won't get any of their mail anymore from their husbands and brothers. Yes, mum was the angry type. The angry mailwoman type.
The soldiers didn't find anything this time, they weren't surprised either, I think they already knew that we weren't stupid and would fall for the same thing twice. We heard stories of what they did when someone tried to fool them, it didn't sound like a party. Some people were taken away and tortured, so they say, I don't believe it, they were cruel but not monsters. Some say they will burn down the houses of those that tried something and it's true, they would burn houses, starting with something small and going from there depending on their moods. We didn't have many burned down houses anymore, grandma told me there were far more when she was young, but as I said, most have already gotten accustomed to it.
But what was living with men like, all the ones I knew where the soldiers that came every now and then, they seemed scary to me and I didn't want to have anything to do with them. But what was my father like? Aunt Shae told me that I'd learn more once they took me into their group, I wouldn't have to do the trial that some other women did, since I was family and they knew already that they could trust me. I wasn't born in town either. I was actually born in the capital, not that I know anything about it, mum was send there when she was caught stealing information from the guards that were placed around the city in the beginning. She was taken there and questioned, she was there a whole year. After her interrogation she was placed with the low lives, well, I can't say low lives, they are those unfortunate souls that were kept to breed. It sounds pretty bad I guess, but life has changed as I mentioned before, things like that are nothing but an ordinary day in life.
Well to get back to the story. Mum was taken there, watched for a week or two, she told me she can't remember, after that time she was taken into a room and what happened doesn't need much explaining. She said she never saw the man, but I can see in her eyes that she does, her hatred for that man is clearer than the full moon on a cloudless night. I'm not sure if she would hate it as much if she wasn't the person she is now. I think my father is someone from higher up, once I've seen mum picking up the remote control from inside the TV. When I asked if they had placed another new and dumb law she just shrugged and told me she saw something really ugly on one of the political channels. She never did that before, screwing up a TV that was needed so badly, was something she would have never dared to do. Angry mailwomen, not something you want to meet in a dark alley in the middle of the night, not even if she is my mother. But why am I here and not in the capital? I wasn't wanted. I was born as a girl, born inferior to everything else. As soon as I was born, we were send home. We weren't needed, mum wasn't needed and I wasn't for a long time.
I don't like the life that awaits me, I don't like the life that I will have if nothing changes and I don't like that no one in the world except a few groups of people seem to care.
May 23, 2051
I wish I could live in the world in which my grandmother grew up in, a world in which most countries had lived in peace and when war was a foreign word and act that had never touched most of the people in the world. My grandmother didn't even know what war meant, she told me, she knew of conflicts and political consequences that would lead to revolutions and something that would cause deaths. She was such an innocent soul; it was only when she was close to her twenties that she had to come face to face with the evil called war. They had known over the news that quite a few countries were not pleased with our female president, who had made one bad choice in her 8 year career. That one choice was so trivial that no one would have cared if it had been made by a man, but being a woman in charge of a whole country had put more pressure on it.
To cut it short, our president was attacked by a whole group of countries, with leaders who were men and had not been able to achieve anything without a man in lead of our country.
>>She's not thinking about equal rights, she's thinking of taking charge and making men bow down to women! A woman should not be leading a country, she should sit at home and have dinner ready when her man comes home from ruling a country to success!<<
My grandmother never cared much about what happened in the politics, especially when it concerned other countries. Today it's different, she's downright glued to it now, every news report she writes down into her little notebook, every change that was placed upon us was taken note of.
But back to the beginning. With our female president gone and almost every man in the country and neighboring countries agreeing, the rule of how to become the states leader had changed. Women were not allowed to be in any higher up position that had to do with international activity. Even though it only meant that no woman was ever allowed to be in charge of anything inside the capital anymore, the idea that they weren't capable of doing anything. Mayors, headmasters, doctors and about every other position in the country that had to do with difficult situations where taken out of female hands and placed into those of men. But again, it was only the beginning and what happened after took many steps.
The first were that everything in life was placed back into the times when women weren't allowed to do any jobs that were seen as a man's job and that lead to a crisis, lots of problems. Demonstrations formed and were held almost every day; women got captured and locked up if they looked able to form a hand of helpers against the state. It was compared to World War II, only less bloody and sadistic. I can't really tell how it was, I have only heard stories, and stories that are being told over years and generations are not always true and don't hold the story that they once did. I think that's how tales and legends start to exist. Grandmother told me, that they started making camps that were later villages and now cities, something an outside would call refugee camp. What they did with those camps was they placed men there that were capable of a better contribution of the country. My grandfather wasn't in them at the beginning, grandma knew him from when they were really young and when she was about 24 she got mum, but then grandfather was already gone. Mum only ever got to see him once, she was 8 at that time, and she was brought into this camp to bring supplies for the new soldiers that they had brought from their countries. Mum wasn't much of a good kid, she got in trouble a lot and didn't like keeping her mouth shut. When she got into the camp she kicked one of the men to the shin and ran out. A man grabbed her by the shirt and pulled her out of trouble, the soldier who ran after her never got his hands on her. The man who saved her was no one other than her father, he didn't know that then, but when mum was made to tell her name and hometown he knew. He brought her back home and was never seen again. He might have gotten in trouble, but that is something I can't think of, men were close to being holy, why would they punish one of the men they gotten for something as trivial as getting a child back to its mother?
Our little town, called Srae consists of about 1,600 women, maybe 100 men hiding in their homes. Some don't like being taken, well, most don't like to be away from their homes, wives, sisters, mothers, aunts, whatever they had, they didn't want life to change for them just because they were born superior to females.
We aren't hiding anyone, at least not right now. We once had this guy here, I don't remember his name, he was from the capital, and wanted to leave the country. From his behavior I think he was a journalist.
>>There's got to be a different life out there, if it was our countries fault, why would they change things everywhere? I need to find out what there is, this can't be right.<<
Well we never heard of him again. I don't think he was caught, he wasn't stupid, but he was an idiot and ran right into the forest, he probably made one hungry bear very happy.
It's hard to say what all these people feel about the situation. We, who stand against everything, hate this life and try to find a way to get out of it and especially to get the people in charge out. The hatred that we feel is beyond words. We were threatened a lot, by the women in our town, by the soldiers and by non-believers. But we were praised by our new government. It had only been 10 years since we were allowed to have one city to be completely in the hands of the women. It was a big step for us all and we were happy to have Lena Krishin as our mayor. She gave us the support that we needed, she made us believe that what we did was right, even if there a lot of steps backwards but if we held true to our ideas we could pull through. Only a few people liked her though, she was very stubborn and hard to handle. She was one of those that had been imprisoned when the army came and took away women for prostitution. Lena kicked the man who was able to grab her mother in the balls and hit him in the face with his own gun, she would have probably grabbed it but when another soldier came she was put down fast and brought into the nearest prison and put into the highest security part. Nine years she spend in there, creating ruckus under the prisoners, until she learned that she could have the same effect on the outside. She spend the next 5 years being the good prisoner and was allowed to leave. Men are stupid. They believe women to be easy and weak and thought that they change in an instant because they fear the big man.
That's one of the first things my aunt taught me.
>>Cry a little or show some leg and you'll be out of there in no time. Men don't got shit for brains.<<
I believe her, but I'm not so sure I would try it in a life and death situation. She should teach me how to shoot with the weapons in the forest, it can't be that hard, when even the girls in the city get taught at the age of 10, well that's what I heard at least.
Part 3
September 30, 2005
It is crazy how much can happen in just two hours. I was on my way back from the Fort, the Sergeant, that bitch, gave me more paper work. I want to go back to my division already, but she won't let me. Telling me that my arm still needs the recovery and that paper work was the only thing I was allowed to do. Lucky me, huh?
But what am I complaining about, things have turned bad just an hour later. Chasey, our president, made the wrong decision and listened to her good for nothing advisor, she made our alliances and countries, that had looked up to our way of handling problems, angry at us. The only thing I heard from Chasey before the big media uproar was her telling me how much of an idiot she was. She had listened to her advisor and started a war with the most influential nation there is. What went through her head that moment? With the declaration of war, which only reason is raw materials, influence and power, everyone pulled back on us, the alliances we had are gone, the countries who came to us for support stopped their calls. It is crazy how fast news travel these days. The news about Chasey being chased out of the office must have traveled much faster. The vice president, the man everyone favoured now, replaced her and tried to be the Samaritan in need. I know I'm not in place to say my believes and thoughts, especially since they can get me into so much trouble, but I believe that it was the vice president who gave the advisor the hint and everything happened from there. He isn't the guy that most people think he is. I only met him once and that had been a moment I wish I could forget.
I don't know what happened to my friend, though. I hope she is doing fine, not blaming herself all that much. They might have locked her up for all I know, they couldn't judge her with her immunity of her position still intact, but for how long?
October 1, 2005
It's hell out there. Politicians are at each other's throats. I sure hope that this will not continue much longer. The place I knew once has turned into an ugly shadow of what it once was.
October 12, 2005
Chasey send me a note. She`s doing fine, so she tells me, but she also says I should hide. I don't know why or even if I should believe it all. What do I got to with this? I'm not sure if I should, I´m part of the military, I have obligations and if I were to run and hide, they would find me and prosecute me for leaving my duty behind.
The Sergeant was replaced, but also degraded and removed from the Fort. She might have had something to do with everything that is going on, but it is hard to believe. Nothing makes sense anymore. The captain who is now in charge of my division told me to come to his office first thing in the morning.
October 14, 2005
I don't have long, they only gave me thirty minutes to pack my stuff and to write a letter to my family. They haven't told me anything, except that I was no longer a Lieutenant and that I would be put into custody until it was proven that I had nothing to do with the president's decision. Being the friend of the most powerful person in the country sure sucked. This will probably be my last note.
Part 4
January 23, 2005
January 23rd, 2005 - Klan, Martin
The letter has been send by express. Make sure that General Edison will not get the original; the message is urgent and very important for the future of our country.
Delete this mail right after reading.
- L.M.
February 5, 2005
February 5th, 2005 - Klan, Martin
Leonie Kleb has been thrown from her position. It has been said that no one wants it to be made public. I do not agree. Send a few quotes and lines to the local newspapers and tell them they are from reliable sources. Do not waste too much time.
Delete this mail right after reading.
- L.M.
February 6, 2005
February 6th, 2005 - Klan, Martin
Good work. The presidential house is not able to find out how the papers have gotten the news. I will send you the next assignments in the following days.
Delete this mail right after reading.
- L.M.
February 20, 2005
February 20th, 2005 - Kolla, Nikolai
I have attached a picture of your appointment. Martin Klan has been seen last in his apartment building. He will not be expecting you to clean up. Be sure not to miss a spot, I do not like my acquaintances to be unhappy. Send me a note when the apartment is free for rent, the details as always attached.
- L.M.
March 1, 2005
March 1st, 2005 - Family Klan
I am very sorry for your loss. Martin was a very dear friend of mine, his death came unexpected and with a lot of unpleasant feelings.
I will not forget Martin, he was a nice man, he was true to his believes, but he had his own demons that he could not share with even his closest friends. I would have hoped to help him in his time of need. He did not seek my help and I was not able to see it.
- Vice President Lars Manning
